8 Tips On How To Talk To Your Partner About Sexual Issues in Your Marriage

Sexual matters are a natural part of the lifestyle of couples both married and not married. However, when looking at married and non-married couples, married couples have more sex than couples who are dating or couples who are not married but live together. A healthy sexual life is an important part of marriage, and ideally, a loving couple will have a satisfactory sexual life throughout their time together.

However, in some cases, sexual issues are a problem in a marriage, and this is something that should not be ignored. Although sex is just one part of a relationship, a lack of sex can harm a marriage and in some cases damage it irreparably. Therefore strengthening the sexual bond is good for a husband and wife.

Although a couple may love each other, communication about sexual matters may be difficult to do. What are examples of some sexual issues and how do you talk to your partner about them?

talk to your sponse

 

1Our Sex Life is Boring

A common complaint that can occur in a marriage, particularly one where a husband and wife have been together for many years, is that one or both people feel that the sexual life they share has gotten stale or boring.

Perhaps a couple is committing the same kind of sexual activity every night without variation. Or, maybe one or both people have grown tired of each other in bed and have gotten too used to each other’s bodies.

These kinds of sexual problems are often the catalyst for straying from the marriage to seek sex elsewhere. In fact, up to 60 percent of all married individuals commit adultery at some time during their marriage.

The willingness to change the routine and try new things is the key for spicing up an otherwise “old” sexual life.

When relaying this information to your partner, never accuse your partner of being “boring.” Instead, take a positive approach. Ask to have sex in a room other than the bedroom – such as the shower. Inquire if your partner would like to try sex with the introduction of a sex toy. (These can be bought in complete privacy on the Internet and shipped to you discreetly.) Determine if your partner would be comfortable experimenting with sexual positions that you rarely or never perform.

 

2I’d Like To Explore My Sexual Fantasies

Experimenting with sexual fantasies is a powerful way to add spice to the sexual life of a married couple. Sexual fantasies are extremely varied in type and intensity.

Is there a fantasy that you would like to explore with your partner? Sit down with your partner and be willing to discuss what you desire. If your partner balks at your suggestions have the courage to ask why? Most experts will tell you that as long as your fantasy involves consenting adults, it is perfectly acceptable. If your partner is willing to explore your fantasies with you, this can be an excellent method to improve the sex life of a marriage.

3We Hardly Have Sex

Another problem in marriages, particularly marriages where the husband and wife have been together for a significant amount of time, is a lack of sex. It’s difficult to say how much sex is too little sex in a marriage. Approximately 80 percent of married couples have sex at least three times a month or more, and at least 32 percent of that 80 percent have sex at least three times a week or more.

How much sex is too little will be determined by how you feel. If you feel the amount of sex is lacking, it probably is.

Sit down with your partner and have an honest talk as to why your sex life is minimal. Are you and your partner working too many hours? Does one of you feel unattractive in bed? Do the demands of children hinder your sexual life? Sit down with each other and try to pinpoint the reason for the problem.

4There’s Never Any Foreplay

Sex without foreplay (the activity that proceeds intercourse) is often an unsatisfactory experience for one or both of the participants. There’s more that goes into sex than just intercourse. Kissing, touching, nibbling, being gentle, undressing, and loving conversation are all a part of foreplay.

While in bed, express to your partner what you would like him or her to do before the actual intercourse. Encourage your partner to slow down and enjoy each other before diving into the main part of sex. This will be better facilitated by not having sex when either of you is pressed for time. Carve out enough time to enjoy each other properly and to allow sufficient time for foreplay leading to the sexual intercourse.

5I Was Raised That Sex Without Procreation Is Bad

Yes, the main reason for sexual intercourse is to produce babies. However, a sex life between two people in a marriage, one that does not involve procreation, is not “bad,” at least according to all of the credited professionals on the subject of sex.

Religious matters are often the reason that sex is considered “bad” without procreation. It is up to you to determine how much of a religious stance, that may be archaic, plays in your life. If your partner is unwilling to have sex unless in the case of procreation, and you disagree with this belief, you will need to determine if the marriage is appropriate for you. A lack of sex due to religious reasons is tough to bend.

6I’m Too Stressed and Tired to Have Sex

Being too tired or too stressed to have sex is a common complaint in the sexual life of married couples. You’re so stressed out during the day, that by the time you get to bed at night you’re too tired to have sex.

The stress can come from work, children, caring for an elderly parent, financial problems, and other issues. When stress is interfering with the sex life of a marriage, the thing to do is to address the problem. Sit down with each other and have a discussion on what is causing the stress. Chances are, however, that you already know. Now is the time to address the issues and try to lessen them.

For example, if you are stressed at work, what can be done to lighten the load? If caring for children is interfering with your sex life, particularly young children, is it possible to have sex while the child is napping or away at school?

7There Are Too Many Kids or Dogs In Our Bed

The family bed is a common practice in certain cultures and a loving way to nurture and care for children and pets. However, when it comes to sex, children or animals sleeping in the same bed with a married couple will likely stop a sexual relationship between the married couple.

If having your children in bed is important to you, sit down with your partner to discuss ways to have sex in other places besides the bedroom. Otherwise, work on the means to coax your children back into their own beds.

As far as pets, putting up a gate or simply closing your bedroom door may help to train your dog to sleep in someplace other than your bed. The dog may bark in protest at first, but eventually, your pet will get the message.

8Sexual Intercourse Hurts or I Can’t Get An Erection

Sometimes sexual problems are the result of physical health or a changing body. For example, middle-aged women who are in menopause may experience dryness which makes sexual intercourse uncomfortable. Middle-aged men may experience erectile dysfunction, making it difficult for them to maintain an erection for satisfactory sexual intercourse.

These are issues that can be addressed relatively easily with the help of medical aids. For women who are experiencing dryness, there are products on the market to help with lubrication. For men, a wide variety of erectile dysfunction products are available to help them maintain erections for sexual intercourse.

Never take a medical product without speaking to your doctor. He or she can access your problem and come up with the appropriate therapeutic approach to improve your situation.

Talking to your partner about sexual issues may seem difficult at first, but with the right methods, sexual problems can be solved in a marriage. The most important thing to do is to be honest and upfront about the issues that you are experiencing. Honest communication opens the door to fixing problems, no matter how complicated the problems may be.

If talking to each other is not bringing improvements, booking an appointment with a therapist trained in the sexual health of couples can help to make communication easier. He or she will have the tools to help you express your concerns and will be able to suggest methods to implement improvements. Sexual issues in a marriage can be fixed with the right approaches.

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Hey folks! I am John and I want to make this blog a great place for everyone to find out more about fitness, dating, sex, and all health related topics. I am very passionate about life, love and fitness. I want more people be more aware of wellness and fitness. Bear in mind: Please do your own research before buying any product that I recommended. If you do buy any product through this site, I receive affiliate commission that helps to grow and maintain this website. Stay foolish, stay hungry and work hard! :)

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